Fun Quiz: Who Are You?


So you have just met someone, maybe gone on a few dates. But are they all they seem? Explore your date’s possible secret identity and find out if they could be a) a fallen angel, b) a bipolar, c) a pirate, d) a spy, or e) a yak.

Pick a quiet moment and say you would like to get to know them better. Ask them the questions and have them ask you. Who knows, you might find out that both of you are in fact yaks!

1. Do you have a super high sex drive?

2. Do you sleep with your students?

3. Do you strip naked in public places?

4. Are you queer?

5. Are you violent?

6. Are you attracted to troubled people?

7. Are you Neurotypical?

8. Can you make incredibly bad decisions?

9. Do ever think like you are going to save the world?

10. Do you write poetry?

11. Are you androgynous?

12. Are you financially inept?

13. Do you love the great outdoors, maybe the mountains or the ocean?

14. Are you sexually aroused by listening to music?

15. Are you a warm person, full of compassion?

16. Do you feel like you have a special mission?

17. Do you have a special affinity to children and animals?

18. Do you get visions, glimpses ot the future or know of a future even that will transpire?

19. Are you really good at teaching?

20. Are you funny?

21. Do you do badly with alcohol?

22. Are you charismatic?

23. Have you ever considered founding a new religion?

24. Will you give everything, even your life, for the cause?

25. Can you talk to dead people?

26. Have you often wished you were dead?

27. Do you really love cheese?


1. Do you have a super high sex drive?

Yes for fallen angel.

Yes for bipolar. Insanely so. 

Pirates strike one as very horny.

Many spies are sensation junkies. There was this guy named Tricycle because he liked threesomes.  And Christine Granville went through guys pretty fast.

Female yaks go into heat once a year, it is fairly brief, and they often only calve every other year. So they at least are not into sex that much.

2. Do you sleep with your students?

Yes for the fallen angels.

 Sometimes for bipolars, but there are hundreds of thousands of bipolar teachers in the closet who are completely safe.

Pirates might go through an apprentice period.  A special kind of bond known as matelotage in which gay pirates married could exist both between equals and those in more of a master-servant type of deal. Famous female pirates such as Anne Bonny and Mary Read were not students.

Spies will sleep with all the people they need for the mission and some other people just for fun. But they probably don’t have time to take on students.

There may be a difference here between wild and domesticated yaks, but probably not.

3. Do you strip naked in public places?

No info on the fallen angels.

Bipolars will do this often when manic or may go without underwear or go barefoot before they are ready to go all out. Most likely the goal in part is to purge the body of accumulated toxins (physical or energetic. Magic is also traditionally done in the nude by some.

Some female pirates supposedly revealed their being female by going partially topless.

Spies might have to strip naked for the mission.

Yaks are already naked, unless their fur is a garment.

4. Are you queer?

Although none of the fallen angels in the literature are queer,  many angels have incarnated as queers, possibly to prevent them from making babies with human women.  

Most bipolars are queer in some way. Many are equal opportunity and would have sex with trees if they could.

Many pirates were gay. Gay people and boats go back a long ways.

“The secret worlds of spying and homosexuality have always gone well together, says Phillip Knightley”

Relatives of the Yak, the American Bison, can practice courting and anal intercourse. Lesbovids need not feel left out — that happens too!

5. Are you violent?

The fallen angels were not themselves violent, that was their offspring. 

Bipolars are certainly capable of violence but there are millions of bipolars who are not violent at all and are often the victims of violence.

Most pirates are said to be violent.

Spies, especially saboteurs, may be violent, but others, depending on their mission, might not be.

Yaks can become aggressive when defending young and young males may charge at each other.

6. Are you attracted to troubled people?

Fallen angels seem to be attracted to physical beauty. 

Bipolars, even if (especially if) troubled themselves, often use a secret sonar to find troubled people, usually troubled in different ways from bipolar troubles.. INFJ bipolars in particular will often try to be their unofficial therapist, certain that they can succeed where actual therapists have failed. Aspies are also drawn to the same kinds of people. We are so damn trusting.

Pirates can be very troubled and like seems to attract like.

Spies are often more attracted to gadgets and dangerous situations.

Yaks tend to avoid humans, whether they are troubled or not.

7. Are you Neurotypical?

Not enough evidence on the fallen angels. 

Bipolars, ADHD folk and Aspies all belong to the same hive and speak a common alien language. One can be any combination of these three. Some theorize the role of Neanderthal DNA in this. All three, unlike Neurotypicals, have a high level of theta waves when adults (usually children do too), which means they are pretty much in half a trance most of the time.

Pirates and spies often exhibit traits of what is popularly called anti-social personality disorder.

Yaks are presumably typical in a yak sort of sense.

8. Can you make incredibly bad decisions?

Fallen angels and Bipolars alike have a long track record on bad decisions.

Pirates and spies can make both great and bad decisions, depending how good they are at their jobs.

A Yak that dies young in the wild probably made a bad decision.

9. Do ever think like you are going to save the world?

Fallen angels thought they were making things better.

 Messianic ideation is so common for bipolars, one might even speak of the banality of the ideation. The way to avoid it is to remember you’re a part of a team and that you are not the decision maker here.

Pirates lack this ambition.

Spies like Joan Pujol Garcia probably did. His finest hour was Normandy where up to the last minute he convinced the Germans that Calais was the real target.

Yaks are so important to Tibetans and Tibetans have a huge global mission, so maybe a yak who thought this way would be correct.

10. Do you write poetry?

No poetry is recorded of the fallen angels. Perhaps this is how they pass their time in that pit where they are imprisoned.

All bipolars write poetry. So did the Enemy, but he was NOT bipolar. Or, for that matter, an INFJ.

Pirates have sea chanties, which is a kind of poetry.

Writing poetry while on a spy mission has been done before. Not recommended while engaged in any direct action but OK in between or in prison.

No volumes of Yak poetry have yet to have been published. 

11. Are you androgynous?

We cannot overlook the possibility of the fallen angels being functional hermaphodites, but there is no evidence. Many regular angels in Medieval art are often very femmy. 

Bipolars are strongly in touch with both their yin and yang sides. They don’t have much of a choice as their brain dominance automatically flips periodically.

Pirates tend to be yangy in behaviour but everyone is familiar with the person who is so assertive in public and quite the opposite in bed.

The most creative people are androgynous so the best spies should aim for this.

Yaks do appear as either male or female but who knows what goes on in their minds.

12.  Are you financially inept?

There was not much of a world economy at the time, so it is hard to say with the fallen angels.

Some bipolars are not so good with budgeting but some can be really good at business like Ted Turner. 

The constant need for raiding and stealing suggests poor budget planning on the part of pirates.

Spies are always moaning about not getting enough money.

Yaks manage to get on without financial worries.

13. Do you love the great outdoors, maybe the mountains or the ocean?

The fallen angels landed on Mt. Hermon, but ocean landings may have been more of a challenge for them. 

Bipolars feel their best outdoors.

Pirates love the high seas. Think the song, “Brandy (You’re a Fine Girl)”.

Spies like to get around too.

Yaks really dig the outdoors too.

14. Are you sexually aroused by listening to music?

We do not know how the fallen angels feel.

Bipolars might not only get off on music they might sprinkle their speeches with clever allusions. Example  “and you and you and you” could allude both to the “Good Morning” song in Singin’ in the Rain and to “So Long Farewell” in The Sound of Music. This double allusion itself, by bringing two musicals together set in two different continents, cleverly reflects the message of unification in the speech.

Bipolars also like to listen to the music of other bipolars, like Mahler and Bruckner.

Pirates tend to get off on fighting but music might work too.

Spies sometimes use music like in The Lady Vanishes.

Most animals like music. Yaks would probably like the Tibetan singing bowls, classical music, and perhaps Opera.

15. Are you a warm person, full of compassion?

This is the litmus test Jung used in analyzing world leaders. Whatever you might say about bipolar Mussolini, he was warm and likable human being and his own individuated person.

It is possible that the fallen angels were only trying to help the humans. 

Within the bipolar population, there are a wide range of spiritual maturity and an immature bipolar can be very unkind, but a developed one is very warm and compassionate.

It really depends on ihe individual. There were certainly compassionate spies and there could be pirates who were at least loyal and kind to their crew. Some of them may have been forced to work as pirates against their will. The pirates of the Crimson Permanent Assurance were true heroes indeed.

Yaks are very warm, thanks to their fur and as mammals, full of love and compassion.

16. Do you feel like you have a special mission?

Fallen angels and bipolars both feel this way.

Pirates can be on a mission to get rich, but some of them would be in employ of a specific government, like that Jewish pirate Lafitte who worked for the French against the Spanish.

Spies have special missions, yes.

All animals have secret special missions, Yaks included.

17. Do you have a special affinity to children and animals?

Fallen angels were apparently bad or neglectful parents or had no idea of what to do with their hybrid kiddies.

Balanced Bipolars and their ADHD/Aspie brethren, however, are great with kids and animals.

Pirates are known for their love of parrots. Long John Silver seemed to bond in a weird way with that kid.

Christine Granville could really charm animals. She was in a tight spot once and managed to connect with and influence an enemy dog.

Yaks do best with other Yaks.

18. Do you get visions, glimpses of the future or know of a future even that will transpire?

The fallen angels seemed to not have this power but Bipolars do now and then, but it is extremely hard to interpret as the information is presented in a symbolic manner.

A good pirate should be able to see if a ship is worth taking.

Spies may have a sixth sense about danger but often will lack long range insight. Though both Noor Inayat Kahn and Hannah Senesh both experienced prophetic calling and foreknowledge.

Yaks will probably get good intuition about the climate for the year.

19. Are you really good at teaching?

The fallen angels were certainly effective teachers although we do not know their methods. Their willingness to teach women puts them ahead of many Oxbridge colleges by some millennia. 

Bipolars who take care of themselves are great teachers. Modesty forbids . . .

A pirate known affectionately as Sally was an incredible math teacher.

Spies could be unreliable teachers but you never know — it’s a great cover. Snape, for instance.

Yaks are good at teaching their young how to be Yaks.

20. Are you funny?

We have no written records of fallen angel humor but one cannot rule out naughty pranks. 

Bipolars can be very funny and are often very morbid about it.

Good humor is found in unlikely places, even among pirates, spies and Yaks.

21. Do you do badly with alcohol?

The question of whether angels actually eat or drink when on earth is a long and complicated one. On the whole, alcohol is probably not a good idea for angels, but the occasional donut and hot chocolate might be OK.

Alcohol + Bipolar = Crisis.

Pirates like their rum. Rum of course is linked with the slave trade.

Good spies should know how to drink without getting drunk. There was a great episode on Get Smart related to this theme.

Yaks should best avoid alcohol of any kind.

22. Are you charismatic?

The fallen angels might have been compelling in this way. 

Bipolars, even shy and soft-spoken ones can come alive when speaking publicly. Whereas some speakers need to warm up by drawing on the energy of the crowd, Bipolars have their own energy source and be equally charismatic to two people as to two thousand. 

Pirate leaders should have charisma.

Both charismatic and boring spies have their places.

Yaks have a lot of power and majesty.

23. Have you ever considered founding a new religion?

Fallen angels would consider this question nonsensical. 

Bipolar founded religions include Islam, Quakers, Shakers, Mormons, Hasidic Judaism, and more, although in many cases, there was no intention to found a religion (or any form of a dynasty).

Pirates don’t seem very religious although they are highly superstitious.

Spies can be both secular or committed to a religion like Hannah Szenes and Noor Unayat Khan. But they probably don’t have time to found a new religion on the mission.

Yaks are so part of the natural spirit web they have no need to found a new religion.

24. Will you give everything, even your life, for the cause?

Being immortal, this question is not relevant for fallen angels.

Bipolars have been giving their lives for this planet for a very long time, equally matched by the taking of their own lives.

Pirates are generally pretty selfish bastards.

Some spies will, others will spend their time obsessed over their missing poodle. (It was a sad story and we all feel for the dog).

Yaks often will spiritually contact with a human hunter and let them know they are willing to become food.

25. Can you talk to dead people?

Fallen angels are probably shut out from this kind of communication although I’m sure they’d like to talk to their dead kids.

Some Bipolars can talk to dead Bipolars/Aspies often better than with live Neurotypicals. I’ve got someone on the line here who wants you to know he did not do anything financially wicked like the FBI report claims. And that stuff with Kopp was not crooked. And he did it all for the cause, not for any personal power.

With pirates and spies this would be more of a gloating and would be one way.

Yaks are more interested in communicating with dead Yaks.

26. Have you often wished you were dead?

Shut up in that pit, the fallen angels may indeed wish for death.

 Bipolars are twice blessed, not only do they often wish they were dead, other people wish they were dead too or at least stigmatized, pathologized, underemployed, and bullied.

Pirates have a strong sense of self-preservation.

Captured spies like Hannah and Noor will often try to kill themselves.

Yaks are rarely suicidal. Maybe an abused or tormented Yak, a Yak that is not allowed to be its full Yakness or fulfill its duty by Yakking the system. YAK = YAG = GAY= GAIA = IGNOBEL?

27. Do you like cheese?

Fallen Angels could like it, given that Unfallen Angels seem to like curds.

Bipolar people crave it the same way people crave hard drugs. Think of Treasure Island, written by Bipolar Robert Louis Stevenson who has his main character crave toasted cheese late at night. Haloumi would be awesome, don’t you think? Speaking in sadness on my grain-free, dairy free, histamine, phytate and lectin lowering diet consisting of no cheese, not even the cashew kind.

Ben Gunn the Pirate in the same novel is also obsessed with cheese.

Spies can be big into food. Is that why so many went to France?

Yaks are best off not consuming fermented dairy products.

Not sure if your love interest is any of these? Fear not, they could still be an Elemental, a space alien, the spirit of an anthill, a galaxy, or even a pastry chef. It’s all good and holy.